Over a lifetime, people come and they go, some stay for a short time and some a long time or a lifetime and, if we are lucky enough, we meet people who have a life-changing impact on our lives. Let me introduce you to a lady who has contributed to the woman I am today, Kate James.

Kate is one of Australia's highly sought after mindfulness experts. Her teaching draws on the science and psychology of meditation, and her aim is to make mindfulness accessible and enjoyable for people from all walks of life. She's the author of five best selling personal development books, including her most recent book, 'Change Your Thinking to Change Your Life'. Her guided meditations have been listened to over three million times on Insight Timer.

Kate really knows her stuff, although her humble self says she isn't an "expert".

I first met Kate over 10 years ago when I cold-called her (emailed actually) to invite her to present at an event I was running in Byron Bay. Within minutes, Kate replied with a firm yes and "let's work out the details later, but I will be there". Together with her husband, Chris, she arrived at Splash in Byron Bay and immediately I was drawn to her calming and grounded presence. I wanted what she had. It was a moment in time when I recognised that I wanted more from life, but I also wanted less. Less of many things but mostly less of the fog and feeling rudderless.

Enter mindfulness

Mindfulness has certainly grown into a buzz word of late, so what does it really mean and, more importantly, why is it important for you as you move through your separation?

I asked Kate these questions on my Podcast.

Kate explains mindfulness

"It's about paying attention in the present moments or really just noticing what's going on. Whether it's your emotions or your thoughts or your physical experience and trying to interact with the present moment from a place of non-judgement. It's really about creating greater awareness of ourselves, of our experience in life, of the way that we interact and relationships and so on, over our external experience....

So it's probably helpful for people to know that there [sic] is a thing in mindfulness, actually, where they talk about using a beginner's mind. And it really is about sort of imagining that you start afresh every day and that you have this beginner's mind and that you really are just starting afresh over and over and over.

Mindfulness allows you to turn inward and turn off the noise for a short time so you can centre yourself, check what you need at that moment. In my experience, when working with people through their separation, they tend to look too far forward and that can become overwhelming and stressful. If this is you, maybe, adding a mindfulness practice to your Separation Toolkit, could help you feel more grounded and secure.

You can listen to the full interview with Kate HERE

As always, my digital door is open and I’m here if you need me. 

Be kind to yourself.

Nikki xo

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