Let’s talk about sex baby (sorry kids look away) …
Oh yes you will have sex again, your nether regions are not ready for closure just yet.
Ladies this one is aimed at you (sorry to the men, don’t worry we’ve got your back over here).
*disclaimer lighthearted approach taken below
Depending on the stage you are at you may have Mrs Self Doubt niggling over your shoulder with the usual suspects “I’m too old”, “too broken”, “not good enough”, “who would want me”, “hi nice to meet, yes separated, 5 kids – oh hang on a minute while I just change that nappy, BRB”.
It’s time to “break up with” Mrs Self Doubt she’s a bitch!
Sex after separation can be freaking daunting but also liberating. It’s new. It’s exciting but freaking daunting. There’s all the things to think about right? At the end of the day we are all human and humans need connection, we weren’t dropped on earth to just wander around on our own.
Ladies, for some of us it’s all about the grooming, you can’t let your guard down “down there”, no one wants to get caught looking like a 70’s porn star with bad undies on. First things first, keep your nether regions in order.
Buy yourself sexy new underwear. You want to feel good about yourself.
Buy condoms – safety first always. If you’ve been in a relationship for any length of time its likely that you haven’t thought about safe sex in a while. Be prepared.
Embrace your sexual freedom, meet new people, dance, laugh, this is the new you or the rebuilding the person you once were.
It’s okay to feel awkward – awkward is normal and chances are he’s feeling the same.
Do not feel guilty. You are allowed the pleasure of sex. It doesn’t have to be forever sex, it can be whatever you chose it to be because you are in the driving seat here.
Be clear on your boundaries and don’t be afraid to communicate those with your new partner and if they run a mile then – see ya. Next …
Remember you are in control, follow your intuition, you’ll know if it’s the right time.
Be kind to yourself.